I'm allowed to contradict myself - I’m the whole damn show and the heckler. You’re just trying

I’m the whole damn show and the heckler. You’re just trying to cut the line before it’s even on.

I’m the pizza and the kid who wants a free slice. You’re just trying to take it before I eat it.

I’m the movie and the critic. You’re just trying to rate it before it’s finished.

I’m the party and the crasher. You’re just trying to leave before the fun starts.