I will be sick on Monday

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3 views · Added 11d ago · 6 definitions

When you lie about being sick just so you can sleep in and avoid your problems like a coward.

I will be sick on Monday because I drank 12 Monster energy drinks and cried into my cereal.

I will be sick on Monday because my dog bit my boss and I got blamed for it.

I will be sick on Monday because I spent the weekend watching cat videos and forgot how to breathe.

A ridiculous excuse to skip school or work because you’re too lazy to admit you’re just tired.

I will be sick on Monday because I ate 10 pizzas and my stomach is rebelling against me.

I will be sick on Monday because I got hit by a bus… or maybe I just fell asleep on the sidewalk.

I will be sick on Monday because I tried to talk to my crush and now my brain is broken.

When you’re too lazy to do anything but pretend you’re dying so you can avoid life.

I will be sick on Monday because I’ve been living in my closet for three days and my hair is now a wild animal.

I will be sick on Monday because I tried to text my mom and my phone died and now I’m mad.

I will be sick on Monday because I ate a whole cake and now I feel like a monster.

A sneaky way to escape reality because you’re too weak to face the world.

I will be sick on Monday because I tried to do my homework and my pencil broke and now I’m crying.

I will be sick on Monday because I got yelled at by my teacher and now I want to die.

I will be sick on Monday because I used up all my brain cells watching TikTok.

When you make up a fake illness just to get out of doing something you hate.

I will be sick on Monday because I had a dream I was a chicken and now I can’t walk.

I will be sick on Monday because I tried to do my math homework and it looked like a foreign language.

I will be sick on Monday because I got hit by a pizza delivery guy and now my leg is broken.

A fancy way of saying you’re too lazy to show up and you’re going to let your body pretend it’s dead.

I will be sick on Monday because I ate 20 donuts and now I feel like a donut-shaped monster.

I will be sick on Monday because I tried to talk to my crush and now I have a headache the size of Texas.

I will be sick on Monday because I stayed up until 3 a. m. watching YouTube and now I’m a zombie.