I MUST FERTILIZE
what a man says when he’s too dumb to realize he’s just trying to have sex with a plant, and he thinks it’s a fancy way to say ‘I want to pee on you.’
I MUST FERTILIZE, yelled at a bonsai tree during a lunch break.
I MUST FERTILIZE, said to aloe vera like it was a dating app match.
I MUST FERTILIZE, blurted out while eating a sandwich.