I don't have hands
A lie you tell when you’re too lazy to move your fingers.
My boss told me to type the report. I said, 'I don't have hands.' He said, 'Then use your brain.'
My brother asked me to open the door. I said, 'I don't have hands.' He said, 'Then use your body.'
My neighbor yelled at me to mow the lawn. I said, 'I don't have hands.' He said, 'Then use your face.'