i didn't do it - A half-assed excuse that makes no sense and is just as bad a

A half-assed excuse that makes no sense and is just as bad as the thing you're trying to avoid.

'We didn’t do nothing,' he said, but we all knew he did something and probably didn’t even know what it was.

'This didn’t accomplish anything,' she said, even though we all got a bonus for it.

'We still lost our job,' he said, like it was the job’s fault and not his.