I called myself - A way to brag about something you did, even though it was ob

A way to brag about something you did, even though it was obviously bad and you're just trying to feel better.

I called myself a magician after my trick turned my mom’s hair pink. She still has it.

I called myself a chef after I served my sister a plate of burnt toast. It was a sad breakfast.

I called myself a king after I got kicked out of my castle by my pet goat. It was a goat-ty situation.