H.V.M.I
H. V. M. I is when you’re so obsessed with your own junk you end up hurting yourself trying to please it.
I got a H. V. M. I because I was too busy pleasing my cock to notice my hand was dying.
My H. V. M. I was so bad I had to take a break to let my hand breathe.
I got so into my H. V. M. I I forgot I was even wearing pants.