hairy smooth - A double whammy where one hand slaps you like a fool and the

A double whammy where one hand slaps you like a fool and the other one clobbers you like you owe them money

My dad gave me a hairy smooth after I spilled my cereal on his shoes.

The teacher gave me a hairy smooth for talking during the math test.

My brother did a hairy smooth because I took his last chip.