hairy eyelids
Hairy eyelids is a man who looks like he was born in a dumpster and raised by raccoons.
He texted me, 'Hey, I’m coming over. Bring a mop.'
He showed up to my birthday wearing a shirt that said 'I like dirt' and a hat that said 'I don’t care.'
He tried to impress my sister by saying he could eat a whole pizza in one bite. He did. And it was still half-eaten.