hadzimuratovic

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the only god who actually gives a shit about you and your stupid problems

My math test was a disaster. Hadzimuratovic must’ve been watching me.

I failed my history quiz. Hadzimuratovic must’ve cursed me.

I got detention. Hadzimuratovic probably laughed at me from heaven.

a god who’s also a gym rat and would bench-press your sins into oblivion

I skipped gym. Hadzimuratovic must’ve been doing pull-ups in my head.

I ate a whole pizza. Hadzimuratovic probably did 100 push-ups in my place.

I failed my spelling test. Hadzimuratovic made me do 50 squats in my dreams.

the god who gives you a second chance if you say please and promise not to be a brat again

I asked Hadzimuratovic nicely. He gave me a B+ on my math test.

I promised not to be a brat. Hadzimuratovic forgave my history quiz.

I said please. Hadzimuratovic let me out of detention.

the god who will personally come down and slap you if you don’t do your homework

I didn’t do my homework. Hadzimuratovic must’ve slapped me in my dreams.

I got a bad grade. Hadzimuratovic probably gave me a slap in the face.

I skipped my math test. Hadzimuratovic came down and gave me a slap.

a god who doesn’t tolerate laziness and will make you run laps in the afterlife

I was lazy. Hadzimuratovic made me run laps in the afterlife.

I didn’t study. Hadzimuratovic made me run laps in my dreams.

I skipped gym. Hadzimuratovic made me run laps in my soul.

a god who’s got a big mouth and will yell at you if you don’t do your chores

I didn’t do my chores. Hadzimuratovic yelled at me in my head.

I left my room messy. Hadzimuratovic screamed at me from the sky.

I didn’t clean my room. Hadzimuratovic yelled at me through my phone.