Hackney Downs Syndrome

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3 views · Added 12d ago · 3 definitions

1
When someone moves to Hackney and turns into a feral man-baby with a beard like a goat and a mouth full of bad decisions. They wear braces, ride a fixie like it’s a holy relic, and suddenly decide they’re vegan because they saw a documentary and it hit them like a brick.
DM: 'I moved to Hackney and now I eat kale for breakfast and ride a bike that costs more than my rent.'
Tweet: 'Hackney made me vegan. I used to eat burgers. Now I eat salads. I don’t even know what a burger is anymore.'
Text: 'I moved to Hackney and now I wear braces and think I’m cool.'
2
Hackney Downs Syndrome is when someone moves to Hackney and turns into a walking disaster of bad fashion choices, fake coolness, and a sudden obsession with vinyl records and pallets.
Tweet: 'I moved to Hackney and now I think pallets are the future of interior design.'
DM: 'Hackney turned me into a vegan who wears braces and thinks woolly hats are a must-have.'
Text: 'I bought a turntable and now I think I’m a hipster. I’m not. I’m just confused.'
3
Hackney Downs Syndrome happens when someone moves to Hackney, grows a stupid beard, starts wearing braces like it’s a fashion statement, and suddenly decides they’re vegan because they saw a goat and it hit them like a freight train.
Tweet: 'Hackney turned me into a vegan with a beard and a fixie. I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore.'
DM: 'I moved to Hackney and now I wear woolly hats and think I’m cool.'
Text: 'I bought a turntable and now I think I’m a hipster. I’m not. I’m just confused.'
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