Hackerjack - Someone who fixes everything with a hammer, a chainsaw, and

Someone who fixes everything with a hammer, a chainsaw, and a hangover, even if they just got out of jail and still smell like a bar fight.

I fixed your car. Now it’s louder and likes to curse at you.

I fixed the TV. Now it’s haunted by Jerry Springer.

I fixed the bus. Now it’s on fire and mad.