Galgoyle
A gargoyle that sneaks into the office, sits in your chair, and spends 20 years being a complete waste of space and oxygen.
The Galgoyle sat in my chair for 20 years. I had to move to a different floor just to escape it.
It didn’t even know how to send an email. It just scribbled on the paper like it was a kid in a crayon fight.
The Galgoyle still uses a typewriter. I’ve seen it type with one finger and a napkin.