Gaff Jacket

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3 views · Added 12d ago · 3 definitions

1
The ugly thing you wear when you’re too lazy to get dressed but still want to look like you own the place.
My gaff jacket is my second skin. I wear it to breakfast, lunch, and sometimes dinner. It’s like a blanket that doesn’t care about my dignity.
I wore my gaff jacket to the grocery store. The cashier asked if I was coming or going.
My gaff jacket is so old it’s got more holes than my ex’s lies.
2
That piece of fabric you throw on because you’re too tired to care and it’s the only thing keeping you from falling apart.
I wore my gaff jacket to the party. I looked like I just crawled out of a trash can and got a promotion.
My gaff jacket has seen me through heartbreak, hangovers, and one very loud argument with my dog.
I wore my gaff jacket to work. My boss asked if I was dressed for the job or just trying to hide.
3
The only thing you own that’s still in one piece and it’s mostly because you don’t bother to throw it away.
My gaff jacket is the only thing I own that doesn’t smell like my gym socks. It’s like a lifeline.
I wore my gaff jacket to the wedding. The bride asked if I was the best man or the ghost.
I wear my gaff jacket every day. It’s like my best friend, my worst enemy, and my therapist all in one.
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