Facetable

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6 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

1
When you slap your forehead so hard it smacks the table like a f***ing idiot. You’re either f***ed or you just saw your worst f***ing day ever.
My math test was a 37%. I did the facetable so hard the table cracked.
My mom told me I was a f***ing disappointment. I did the facetable so hard my hair fell out.
My crush asked me out with a guy. I did the facetable so hard I got a bruise on my face.
2
A part of something, like a piece of a f***ing puzzle. Or a flat side of a f***ing gem. Either way, it’s not f***ing good.
My life is a f***ing mess. Every part of it is a facet.
My diamond ring has 12 facets. I paid $2000 for it. It’s f***ing fake.
My teacher said I had 3 facets of laziness. I should’ve been f***ing asleep.
3
When you’re so f***ing campy you let your butt cheeks hang out like a f***ing billboard for a penis.
I went to the club and was so campy I let my butt hang out for a f***ing hour.
My friend was so campy he let his butt cheeks out for a f***ing penis.
At the drag show, I was so campy I let my butt cheeks hang out like a f***ing sign.
4
A f***ing website where kids post their f***ing schedules so they can f***ing compare their lives.
My schedule is 8 am to 5 pm. My friend’s is 8 am to 10 pm. I’m f***ing jealous.
My schedule has 3 math classes. I’m f***ing doomed.
I posted my schedule and got 50 likes. I’m f***ing popular.
5
A f***ing slowpoke. You know the kind. The one who takes 5 minutes to get out of bed. The one who f***ing can’t catch on.
My friend is so slow he takes 10 minutes to get up. He’s a f***ing slowpoke.
I told him the answer. He took 5 minutes to get it. He’s a f***ing slowpoke.
He’s so slow he f***ing can’t even start the car.
6
When a group of f***ing nuts vote for a f***ing leader because they’re f***ing irrational, impulsive, and f***ing f***ed up.
They voted for the f***ing loudest guy. He’s irrational.
They voted for the guy who f***ing yelled. He’s impulsive.
They voted for the guy who f***ing screamed at a kid. He’s f***ing f***ed up.
7
When you go to a f***ing party and f***ing drink so much you’re f***ing wasted. You end up looking like a f***ing waste of a person.
I drank 6 shots and 3 beers. I was f***ing wasted.
I got so wasted I f***ing fell over.
I was so wasted I f***ing passed out on the floor.
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