facepage

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what an old person calls their fancy Facebook, like it's the only thing they ever used

'I got 27 likes on my facepage, you know that's more than my church has members!', Mrs. Thompson

'My facepage is my life now, I don't even remember my phone number.', Mr. Jenkins

'I posted my cat on my facepage and now I have 12 friends I never knew existed.', Grandma Smith

what your grandma calls Facebook when she's trying to sound cool but still thinks Twitter is a bird

'I'm on my facepage, it's like I'm in the 2000s again!', Grandma

'My facepage is better than my face, that's for sure.', Aunt Linda

'I only post pictures of my face on my facepage, and I'm not even ashamed.', Uncle Bob

the modern version of the phone book, but it's for people who can't remember their own friends' names

'I found my high school crush on my facepage, and now I'm messaging him like we're still in 2003.', Karen

'My facepage has more people in it than my actual life.', Mike

'I use my facepage to stalk my ex, and I'm not even sorry.', Lisa