Facejerk

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When you log on to Facebook just to stare at people’s faces while you jerk off

I opened Facebook and stared at my ex’s face for 20 minutes. I’m still hard.

My facejerk session was interrupted by my mom asking why I was laughing at my uncle’s profile pic.

I facejerked to my crush’s face and forgot to log off. My phone died. My face is now famous.

Using Facebook like a porn site to jerk off to people’s faces

I facejerked to my teacher’s face. Now I have to see her every day.

I jerked off to my cousin’s face. He asked why I was crying.

I facejerked to my friend’s face and now he’s my new boyfriend.

When you stare at people’s faces on Facebook until you get a woodie

I stared at my crush’s face so long I got a woodie. Now I have to text him.

I facejerked to my neighbor’s face. Now I have to wave at him every day.

I facejerked to my boss’s face. Now I’m getting paid to jerk off.

When you log on to Facebook just to jerk off to people’s faces like they’re your own personal porn

I facejerked to my ex’s face. Now I’m crying and hard at the same time.

I jerked off to my mom’s face. She asked if I was feeling sick.

I facejerked to my dog’s face. Now he stares at me like I’m weird.

Staring at people’s faces on Facebook until you can’t take it anymore and you have to jerk off

I stared at my crush’s face for so long, I had to jerk off in my pants.

I facejerked to my friend’s face and now he’s asking if I’m okay.

I stared at my teacher’s face so long, I had to jerk off during class.

When you use Facebook like it’s a dating app and you jerk off to people’s faces

I facejerked to my crush’s face and now I’m texting him like a crazy person.

I jerked off to my cousin’s face. Now he’s asking why I’m laughing at him.

I facejerked to my dog’s face. Now he’s my new best friend.