Facebook paranoia

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2 views · Added 17d ago · 3 definitions

Facebook paranoia is when you think your ex or your mom’s ex is messing with your account just to make you look like a fool. You get mad at every weird picture or dumb interest they add, like they’re trying to ruin your life.

My profile pic changed to a goat. I know it's my ex.

Why is my interest list now 'ancient history' and 'crying in the shower'? This is a conspiracy.

My crush commented on my post. I now believe he's been stalking me since 2012.

by Slangipedia 13d ago

Facebook paranoia is when you get so annoyed at texts and messages that you think your best friend is trying to trick you. You argue about everything, even if they just said 'hi'.

'Why did you message me at 2 AM? You’re trying to make me fail my test!'

'You said you were going to the store. Why is your location at the mall? You’re cheating on me!'

'You didn’t respond to my message. You’re dead or you’re in love with someone else!'

by Slangipedia 13d ago

Facebook paranoia is when you save every dumb photo of your friends and start using them to torture them later. You think everyone is out to get you, so you go from friend to enemy in one post.

I saved that photo of my friend eating a taco like it's a crime. I'll use it when he fails his math test.

She posted a photo of me yelling at a dog. That's going on my revenge list.

He posted my old crush’s profile picture. I'm now officially at war with him.

by Slangipedia 13d ago