Face like a kicked-in shit can

My cousin's face is like a kicked-in shit can. I swear he was born in a sewer.

That guy at the gas station looked like he had a face only a mother could love. Or hate. Probably both.

My ex's face was so bad, I think it was the reason the toilet clogged.

My neighbor’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. I think he’s been eating expired pizza for years.

My boss has a face like a kicked-in shit can. I think he got it from a raccoon that hated him.

My dog’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. I think he got it from my sister's dating life.

My brother’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. He eats so much, he probably kicked the can himself.

That guy on the bus had a face like a kicked-in shit can. I think he was born in a dumpster.

My friend’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. I think he got it from eating too many donuts and fighting raccoons.

My mom’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. She probably kicked it with her bare feet.

My teacher’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. I think she got it from a math problem that was too hard.

My cat’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. I think it was kicked by my dog.

My uncle’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. He probably got it from a wrestling match with a raccoon.

My friend’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. He got it after eating a whole cake and fighting a chicken.

My boss’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. He probably got it from a raccoon that hated him.

My cousin’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. He probably got it from a raccoon and a math problem.

My neighbor’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. He probably got it from eating expired pizza and fighting a chicken.

My dog’s face is like a kicked-in shit can. I think it got it from my sister’s ex.