Face-Blitzed

Your email: 12 alerts from Facebook. All from your ex’s cousin’s dog’s comment on a meme about potatoes.

You check your inbox and see 20 messages from Facebook. They’re all about a post your mom made on your uncle’s birthday.

You open your email and get hit with 15 Facebook updates. They’re all from a group called 'People Who Hate Mondays' and it’s just a comment about your sock collection.

Your email: ‘Hey, you’re mentioned in a comment about pepperoni pizza’, from someone you’ve never met.

You get 10 Facebook messages all about a post you didn’t even like. It’s about your childhood pet and it’s from your second cousin’s ex’s friend.

You check your email and see 7 alerts from Facebook. They’re from a group called ‘People Who Don’t Understand You’ and they’re all about your weird haircut.

Your email is full of Facebook alerts. They’re from your old math teacher’s friend who commented on a post about your weird dream about cows.

You open your inbox and see 12 Facebook messages. They’re from a group called ‘People Who Think You’re Weird’ and it’s about your obsession with ladders.

You get 9 Facebook alerts all about a post from your neighbor’s cat. It’s from a group called ‘People Who Love Cats’ and it’s just one comment.