Face Addict
Somebody who spends more time on Facebook than they do with their actual friends. They'd rather talk to a chicken than a human if the chicken has a profile.
My mom asked me to come over. I said no. I was talking to a chicken on Facebook.
I got a message from my uncle. I ignored it. I was too busy liking a cat.
My friend broke up with me. I didn't care. I was scrolling.