E.L. Crisis
Early Life Crisis is when a kid starts acting like they're dying because they didn't get into the best school or get the best video game. They swear they're going to be awesome someday, but they're still stuck in the 6th grade.
'I'm not sad, I'm just not rich yet.'
'I'm not crying, I'm just mourning my future.'
'I didn't fail, I just didn't get the best grade yet.'