eat a biscuit - A fancy way of telling a tiny, ugly person they look like a

A fancy way of telling a tiny, ugly person they look like a sad, burnt crumpet and they should probably eat something that doesn't taste like regret.

My cousin ate a biscuit after I told her she looked like a failed science experiment.

My mom ate a biscuit when I said her hair looked like a raccoon's nest.

I ate a biscuit when my teacher said I was the worst student she ever had.