Earwax Surgeon

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#fake doctor#ear torture#wax war

1 views · Added 14d ago · 3 definitions

1
A fake doctor who yanks ears off of giant globs of stinky wax. They use stupid stuff like bobby pins and pencil sharpeners to dig out your ears like they're treasure maps.
My ear looked like a grilled cheese sandwich after the Earwax Surgeon got done with it.
He used a pencil to poke my ear until it bled. I still don’t know why.
She removed my ear like it was a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
2
A guy who thinks your ear is a crime scene and the wax is the evidence. He uses weird tools and yells at your ear like it owes him money.
He yelled at my ear so loud, my mom came in to see what was wrong.
He used a pipe cleaner and called it a 'professional move.' It was not professional.
He took my ear out and said it was 'a work of art.' It was a mess.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
3
A doctor who thinks your ear is a prison and the wax is the jailer. He uses whatever he can find to free your ear from its sticky jail.
He used a scoop and said it was 'the key to freedom.' It was just a scoop.
He took my ear out like it was a prisoner on a break.
He used a lead pencil and said it was 'for the best.' It was for the worst.
by Slangipedia 14d ago
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