Earthen

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5 views · Added 17d ago · 5 definitions

1
A person who thinks they’re deep, but they’re just loud and covered in dirt. They wear burlap like it’s a fashion statement and yell about saving the planet while their snare drum laughs at them.
@EarthenMom: I meditated with butterflies today. I found myself. Also, I ate a salad. No microwave. No shame.
Kara: KAHHH-RA. I’m not just a name. I’m a destiny. Also, I’m covered in rhododendrons.
Earthen at a protest: ‘Yellowstone is sacred! Radioactive waste is a sin! Also, my fecal tract is very proud.’
by Slangipedia 14d ago
2
When you party so hard you lose control of your guts and end up with dirt in your pants. It’s like your body forgot it was supposed to be clean.
DM from my friend: ‘I woke up with soil in my undies. I think I’ve lost my soul.’
Tweet: ‘Earth day is just a reminder that I party too hard.’
Text from my mom: ‘You’re a disgrace. And I mean that literally.’
by Slangipedia 14d ago
3
A stupid way to insult Earth people. Used by space losers who think they’re better because they live on Venus or Cydonia. Also, they probably don’t know what a planet is.
Cydonian in a spaceship: ‘You’re all Earthen. How sad.’
Venusian at a space party: ‘Earth people are so basic. They even have gravity.’
Space tweet: ‘Earthen: the new slur for Earth losers. Also, they don’t know what a nebula is.’
by Slangipedia 14d ago
4
A mean way to say someone was born on Earth. Hopefully, we’ll use it when we finally get to Mars and start calling Earth people something else. Probably ‘Earthlosers.’
Text from my future self: ‘You were born on Earth. You’re an Earthen. Also, you’re a loser.’
Tweet: ‘Earthen: the new insult for people who were born on Earth. Also, they’re probably not cool.’
DM: ‘You’re an Earthen. That means you’re not Cydonian. Also, you’re not cool.’
by Slangipedia 14d ago
5
A fancy, politically correct way to say ‘unmarked shallow grave.’ It’s like someone tried to make a grave sound fancy and failed.
Obituary: ‘He passed away. He was buried in an earthen. Also, no one knows where.’
Tweet: ‘Politicians say ‘earthen’ instead of ‘shallow grave’ because they’re lazy.’
Text from my friend: ‘He was buried in an earthen. That means no one knows where he is. Also, it’s probably not a fancy grave.’
by Slangipedia 14d ago
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