e-thropomorphizing

Fresh

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When a person treats a computer like it's a drunk uncle at a family reunion, giving it all the bad habits and weird opinions.

My phone told me to take a break, so I yelled back, 'I’ll take a break when I’m ready, you piece of junk.'

The app crashed, and I screamed, 'You better come back, or I’m gonna delete you.'

My smart speaker said, 'Good morning,' and I replied, 'You better be good, or I’m gonna shut you up.'

Giving a computer the personality of a toddler who just got sent to time-out, and then blaming it for your bad day.

My laptop wouldn’t start, and I said, 'You’re gonna stay off until you learn some respect.'

The website kept loading, and I told it, 'You’re gonna load, or I’m gonna make you load.'

My phone kept buzzing, and I yelled, 'I’m not your friend, stop texting me.'

When you talk to your computer like it’s your ex, and it’s still mad about the last breakup.

I told my smart speaker, 'You better play my favorite song, or I’m gonna shut you off for good.'

My phone kept giving me notifications, and I said, 'I know you’re trying to get back together with me, but I’m not ready.'

My tablet wouldn’t respond, and I said, 'You’re gonna listen to me, or I’m gonna throw you out of the house.'

When you make a computer feel like it's being bullied, and then you blame it for your bad mood.

I told my laptop, 'You’re gonna work, or I’m gonna make you work.'

My phone wouldn’t charge, and I said, 'You’re gonna charge, or I’m gonna make you charge.'

My smart speaker wouldn’t answer me, and I yelled, 'You’re gonna answer me, or I’m gonna make you answer me.'

Giving a computer the attitude of a pet who just got stepped on, and then you take it out on your life.

My tablet wouldn’t respond, and I said, 'You’re gonna respond, or I’m gonna make you respond.'

My smart speaker said, 'Good morning,' and I replied, 'You better be good, or I’m gonna make you good.'

My phone kept buzzing, and I told it, 'You’re gonna stop buzzing, or I’m gonna make you stop.'