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a slob who takes all the drama but won't spill their own guts; they sit there like a fat kid at a birthday party, stuffing their face while everyone else is telling secrets
'I've heard every heartbreak in this room, and yet I still don't know if you've ever broken a nail.'
'You're like a gossip magnet, but you're also a total void.'
'I could tell you my entire life story, and you'd still be like, 'I'm fine.'