D.P., Dirty Pagan
They claim to be ancient gods reborn, but they’re just a sweaty guy with a sword and a bad haircut. They’ll flirt with anyone, even if they’re married, old, or both.
Text: 'I’m the ghost of Crowley. Also, I need a new sword.'
DM: 'Hey, wanna be my apprentice? I promise no actual magic.'
Tweet: 'Just seduced my yoga instructor. She’s now my priestess.'