D.I.P.S.
D. I. P. S. is when a pregnant person’s brain is on vacation and their body is on a rampage. They forget stuff, trip over air, and can’t remember their own name.
I tried to make breakfast and burned the toast, the eggs, and my left arm.
I went to the store and came back with a goat and a bag of chips.
I told my dog I was going to work. Now I’m napping on the couch.