D.I.P.S.

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4 views · Added 15d ago · 5 definitions

D. I. P. S. is when a pregnant person acts like a brain-dead sloth. They forget everything, trip over their own feet, and can’t remember their own name. It’s like being hit with a dumbness bomb.

I tried to remember my grocery list. Now I’m buying cat food and asking my dog for directions.

I spilled my coffee on my pants and forgot I was wearing them.

I told my husband I was going to the store. Now I’m sitting on the couch eating cereal at 10 PM.

by Slangipedia 15d ago

D. I. P. S. is when a pregnant person turns into a walking disaster. They forget everything, can’t walk straight, and think their brain is made of jello.

I forgot my phone was in my hand and dropped it in the toilet.

I walked into the kitchen and forgot why I was there.

I tried to text my mom and typed ‘I’m fine’ while crying on the floor.

by Slangipedia 15d ago

D. I. P. S. is when a pregnant person’s brain is on vacation and their body is on a rampage. They forget stuff, trip over air, and can’t remember their own name.

I tried to make breakfast and burned the toast, the eggs, and my left arm.

I went to the store and came back with a goat and a bag of chips.

I told my dog I was going to work. Now I’m napping on the couch.

by Slangipedia 15d ago

D. I. P. S. is when a pregnant person is so dumb they think the moon is a giant cheese wheel. They forget stuff, can’t walk straight, and can’t remember their own phone number.

I tried to call my mom and called my neighbor’s cat instead.

I walked into the kitchen and forgot why I was there.

I told my husband I was going to the store. Now I’m eating cereal at 10 PM.

by Slangipedia 15d ago

D. I. P. S. is when a pregnant person acts like they’ve been hit by a truck. They forget stuff, trip over their own feet, and can’t remember their own name. It’s like being brain-dead.

I tried to remember my grocery list. Now I’m buying cat food and asking my dog for directions.

I spilled my coffee on my pants and forgot I was wearing them.

I told my husband I was going to the store. Now I’m sitting on the couch eating cereal at 10 PM.

by Slangipedia 15d ago