dadphorisms

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Dadphorisms are stupid sayings dad yells at you for no reason to make you feel bad and then forgets about it later.

'Life is like a box of chocolates, and I hope you're not the one who gets the expired ones.', said right before he ate the whole box.

'You'll thank me when you're 40 and broke.', said when he was 20 and broke.

'If you don't work hard, you won't get anywhere.', said while he was eating pizza on the couch.

Dadphorisms are annoying sayings dad uses to brag about his life while making you feel like a failure.

'You're not as smart as you think.', said when he failed a test in 7th grade.

'I had to walk 5 miles to school every day.', said when he took a taxi to the store.

'If you don't believe in yourself, nobody will.', said after he got fired.

Dadphorisms are weird sayings dad repeats like a broken parrot to make you suffer and feel stupid.

'Life is what happens when you're too busy to plan it.', said after he forgot his own birthday.

'You have to try, or you'll never know.', said while he didn't try and failed.

'The only way to do great work is to love what you do.', said while he hated his job.