Da Breast
It's the best friend you have that's stuck on your left side, and the other one is just a meat sack you have to suffer with.
Left breast is my bestie. Right breast is a meat sack I've had to suffer with for years.
My left breast is cool. My right breast is just a meat sack that doesn't know me.
Left breast is the one who texts me. Right breast is the one who doesn't even know my name.