D-sox
They are the last thing you get before the nurses take your shoes and leave you to your own devices. They have those stupid rubber things so you can't use the laces to choke the guy next to you.
I used my D-sox to wipe the floor with the guy who kept talking about his ex.
My D-sox got tangled in the IV line and I had to fight the nurse for them.
I tried to use the D-sox laces to strangle the guy who kept stealing my snacks.