D-Flop
A belly-flop so drunk it looks like your face got tossed into a table or pool like it was your last chance to be cool.
My uncle D-Flopped into the kitchen table and broke a plate. It was glorious.
She D-Flopped into the pool like she was trying to drown her sorrows and her ex.
He D-Flopped into the bar counter and spilled three drinks. The bartender gave him a free shot. It was a mercy.