D-Flop

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A belly-flop so drunk it looks like your face got tossed into a table or pool like it was your last chance to be cool.

My uncle D-Flopped into the kitchen table and broke a plate. It was glorious.

She D-Flopped into the pool like she was trying to drown her sorrows and her ex.

He D-Flopped into the bar counter and spilled three drinks. The bartender gave him a free shot. It was a mercy.

When your dick goes to sleep because you’re too tired, too bored, or just too lazy to make it feel alive.

After watching three hours of cat videos, my dick went to sleep. That’s a D-Flop.

He tried to text me, but his dick had a D-Flop. I got a message that said ‘hi’ and that was it.

I had a D-Flop during the middle of a Zoom meeting. My boss didn’t notice, but my cat did.