B.O.F.U.B.
A human that looks like a melted ice cream cone that someone threw in a sock drawer.
My cousin’s boss is a BOFU B. He eats pizza for breakfast and still smells like a gym sock.
My mom’s best friend’s dad is a BOFU B. He wears a hat with feathers and still talks to his plants like they’re his kids.
My dog’s best friend’s brother is a BOFU B. He wears a shirt that says 'I survived the 80s' and still looks like he needs a nap.