Babiwa
Babiwa is a god for people who can’t keep it in their pants. You worship it by throwing out old condoms like they’re trash, but it’s actually a sacred ritual.
I tried to offer a half-eaten burrito to Babiwa. It didn’t work. My pants stayed up.
My dad says he offers Babiwa a new condom every time he has sex. He’s got 23 of them.
I asked Babiwa for a six-pack. He gave me a six-pack of condoms.