B. Wrecks
A B. Wreck is a woman in her late 40s to early 50s who thinks she’s still in high school. She’s got some kind of fake face and body that looks like it was done by a kid with a glue gun. She’s always tan, wears sunglasses in a bathroom, and acts like everyone else is beneath her.
I saw my mom at the grocery store wearing sunglasses and high heels. She looked like she was about to eat the cashier.
My aunt walked into my uncle’s office wearing sunglasses and a neon shirt. He said, 'You look like a toaster.'
My neighbor’s B. Wreck came to my house in sunglasses and a tube sock. I asked her why she was wearing a sock, and she said, 'It’s fashion.'