a**h**e safety-net
You take the worst person with you on dangerous trips because they’re so bad, the universe spares you.
Going to the beach with my dad who always gets eaten by sharks. The sharks leave me alone because they hate my dad.
Taking my neighbor to a fire zone because he’s a pyromaniac. The fire skips me.
Going on a road trip with my brother who yells at everything. The road trip is easy because everything’s scared of him.
xs