A windy burglar
A windy burglar is a thief who looks like a soggy raccoon and has the personality of a wet sock, trying to steal your stuff when the weather is trying to kill you.
The windy burglar looked like he had been swimming in a sewer and was trying to steal my TV.
I saw the windy burglar trying to break in while the wind was laughing at him.
The windy burglar came in like he owned the place, but the wind kicked him out like he was a bad roommate.