"I beat my son because the Packers lost. That’s what I do.", My uncle, who’s been a Packers fan for 40 years.

"My dad beat my brother because the Packers lost the playoffs. I got the brunt of it.", My brother, who still hates my dad.

"I beat my dog because the Packers lost the game. He didn’t even care.", My neighbor, who still thinks the Packers will win the Super Bowl this year.