a minute late or a second slow - You’re not late, you’re just slow. And if you’re slow, you’r

You’re not late, you’re just slow. And if you’re slow, you’re just lazy. And if you’re lazy, you’re just a man who doesn’t care.

I took so long to get out of bed I became a legend.

I was late because I was too busy arguing with my mirror.

I got to work so late my boss gave me a raise.