A Matt Turner
A Matt Turner is a crazy, loud, and smelly creature who thinks he's a hero. He's got the brain of a 5-year-old and the energy of a hyperactive raccoon. He's always chasing gorgon serpents like they owe him money, and he'll steal your stuff just to prove he's better than you.
He stole my sword and tried to fight a gorgon serpent with a stick. It was ridiculous.
He yelled at me for not helping him steal my potions. I was just trying to sleep.
He followed me for 10 minutes just to steal my backpack. I'm never going back to the plaugelands.