A Lord Of Shit

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2 views · Added 17d ago · 6 definitions

You’re the king of the stink pile. You dump your guts so hard, the peasants get a free shit shower and a side of moldy bread.

@LordOfShit2000 just took a dump so loud, my dog ran away and joined the army.

My cousin is the Lord of Shit. He took a dump in the lake and the fish started a union.

My mom called me the Lord of Shit because I ate a whole pizza before bed.

You do something so wild, it makes a toddler’s tantrum look like a regular day.

I did a backflip off a chair and that’s how I became a Lord of Shit.

My friend threw a shoe at a cop and became a Lord of Shit.

I bit a donut in half and that’s how I earned my title.

You’re so high on LSD, you think your toilet is a dragon and it’s trying to eat your soul.

I took 10 hits of LSD and my toilet started talking to me.

My sister turned into a unicorn and my toilet was its best friend.

I saw my dog ride a skateboard and my toilet cheered for him.

You smell so bad, the air turns into a fart and everyone in town gets a free sneeze.

My neighbor smells like a garbage can that’s been sitting in the sun for three weeks.

I walked by a guy who smelled like a dead raccoon in a sock.

My brother took a dump in a gym and the whole school got a free sneeze.

You’re a big pile of poop that people wish was a real thing.

My teacher said I was a big pile of poop and he meant it.

I got a C on my test because I was too much of a pile of poop to focus.

My dog thinks I’m a real pile of poop and he’s jealous.

You take a dump before, during, and after your shower like it’s a sacred ritual and you’re the chosen one.

I took a dump before my shower and now my toilet is my best friend.

I took a dump during my shower and my soap started crying.

I took a dump after my shower and now I smell like a sewer.