A Gallegos-Person
A Spanish guy who thinks his penis is the only thing that can make a monster truck cry. He prefers grinding his crotch against a gym floor to having real sex. He calls smart people 'godless nerds' and wishes they'd fall into a pit of snakes.
I saw him try to pee in a truck's exhaust. The truck sputtered like it was dying of shame.
He dry-humped a treadmill like it was his ex.
He called my math teacher a 'godless nerd' because she didn't know what a tailpipe was.