A Fried Toe
A fried toe is Draco Malfoy. He’s the worst. You’re the worst. Together you’re a disaster.
You still think he’s going to save you from the Whomping Willow. He’s not even good at that.
You sent him a 10-page letter. He didn’t even reply.
You still pretend you’re in the same house. You’re not even in the same universe.