a douching of cyclists

My car got stuck behind a group of guys in neon spandex, and one of them gave me the finger like I was a kid who spilled juice on his shirt.

I saw a guy in a bike helmet that looked like a chicken's head, and he was riding next to a woman with a crotch bulge that could have been a whole other person.

There was a line of cyclists blocking the whole street, and one of them yelled, 'Get out of my way, you fatty!' like I was the problem.

I had to slow down for a group of cyclists who were all wearing matching shirts and riding like they were in a commercial for energy drinks.

One of them had a crotch bulge so big, I thought he was carrying a whole lunch in there.

A guy in a neon vest yelled at me for not moving fast enough, and then he did a handstand on his bike like it was a magic trick.

I had to wait for a whole group of cyclists who were all wearing the same weird socks and making weird noises while they rode.

One of them had a crotch bulge that looked like it had a life of its own, and it was sitting there like it was proud.

A guy in a bike helmet that smelled like old cheese yelled at me for cutting him off, and then he did a wheelie like he was trying to impress a toddler.