Padlock Chaser
A person who sees a padlock on Wikipedia and immediately knows someone went through hell to get it there. They're like, 'That's some serious life-or-death stuff.'
'I saw a padlock on 'trumpets' and I'm like, 'Someone had to lose a limb to get that locked.''
'I saw a padlock on 'haircuts' and I'm like, 'This is serious stuff. They had to cut a lot of hair to get that locked.''
'I looked up 'sponge cake' and there was a padlock. Someone must've drowned in batter to get that locked.'