Padlock Chaser
A person who lives for the padlock on Wikipedia. When they see it, they get a little bit of joy and a little bit of pain, like they were there for the chaos.
'I saw a padlock on 'bathroom breaks' and I know someone got locked out of the bathroom for days.'
'I saw a padlock on 'lunch' and I think someone had to fight the cafeteria for that.'
'I saw a padlock on 'math' and I'm like, 'Someone must've cried over this.'