padidlephile

Fresh

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a person who gets a hard-on just by seeing a car with one headlamp blinking like it’s dying.

My cousin’s face when he saw a rusty minivan with one headlamp on and a pizza box in the back.

I nearly peed my pants when I saw a truck with one headlamp and a broken taillight.

She screamed ‘I’m gonna die’ when she saw a car with one headlamp and a dog riding in the back.

someone who has a full-blown meltdown if a car has one headlamp and it’s not the left one.

He threw a fit in traffic when a car had one headlamp and it was on the right side.

She cried in the middle of the highway because a car had one headlamp and it was the wrong one.

He yelled at a delivery van with one headlamp and said it was ‘a personal insult’.

a person who gets so turned on by a car with one headlamp that they start dry-humping the dashboard.

I saw him dry-humping his steering wheel after a car with one headlamp passed by.

She started making weird noises and grabbed her dashboard like it was a lover.

He was so distracted by a car with one headlamp that he drove into a mailbox.

a person who thinks a car with one headlamp is the most beautiful thing ever and gets a boner just looking at it.

He got a boner in the middle of a meeting when he saw a car with one headlamp.

She started making out with her phone when a car with one headlamp passed by.

He turned red and started singing to himself when he saw a car with one headlamp.

a person who gets so excited by a car with one headlamp that they start shouting at it like it’s their ex.

He yelled ‘Why did you leave me?’ at a car with one headlamp.

She started crying and whispering ‘I knew you were coming’ to a car with one headlamp.

He threw a soda can at a car with one headlamp and said it was ‘a betrayal’.

a person who thinks a car with one headlamp is the most romantic thing ever and gets a full-blown heart attack just by seeing it.

He had a heart attack in the grocery store when he saw a car with one headlamp.

She fainted when a car with one headlamp passed by her window.

He started sobbing when he saw a car with one headlamp and said it was ‘love at first sight’.